Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
you so ugly when you look in the sky you stop bird dookie from falling.
I have only ever read one book in my life, and that is White Fang. It's so frightfully good I've never bothered to read another
There's always a light at the end of the tunnel...just hope it's NOT a train!
Jury--Twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer
I'm so unlucky that if I was to fall into a barrel of nipples I'd come out sucking my thumb.
An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
If A equals success, then the formula is _A = X + Y + Z_. X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut. -- Albert Einstein
If A equals success, then the formula is: A = X + Y + Z, X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut
All animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others
Don't follow in my footsteps, I walk into walls.
MOP AND GLOW - Floor wax used by Three Mile Island cleanup team
God must love stupid people; He made so many.
I always look skint. When I buy a Big Issue, people take it out of my hand and give me a pound
A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it
You! Out Of The Gene Pool!
YOU! Out of the gene pool.
One drop of ink may make a million think.
Why did God give beauty queens one more brain cell than horses? So they wouldn't shit on stage.
What s good for the goose is good for the gander.
Be nice society already sucks.
Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
I can't go to work today. The voices told me to stay home and clean the guns.
People who think they know what they're doing are especially annoying to those of us who do.
Once a make up my mind, I'm full of indecision.
Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.
The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too.
I am no more humble than my talents require.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
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